- Larry Bird and frugality - 1 Update
- On hosting, money, and child friendships - 1 Update
- "Some disabled people have even decided to end their lives because their healthcare expenses grew too costly...But I'm still in favor of right-to-die rules that offer end-of-life options to more than just terminally ill patients. ..." - 3 Updates
| Lenona <lenona321@yahoo.com>: Nov 01 12:24PM -0700 Someone pointed out that he shortened his career by hurting his back carrying cement when he could have hired someone else to do it, but then another poster pointed out that accidents happen ON the court, all the time. Not just off the court. https://www.basketballnetwork.net/off-the-court/larry-bird-remembers-when-players-that-later-went-bankrupt-made-fun-of-him-for-saving-his-money "Larry Bird remembers when players that later went bankrupt made fun of him for saving his money - 'They'd just laugh and make jokes about me stashing my money away.' " "Larry Bird believed in hard work and being smart about money which is the main reason why he always refused to give money away to players that went broke." |
| Lenona <lenona321@yahoo.com>: Nov 01 10:54AM -0700 I like the balanced answer. So many factors had to be considered. (You can't see the comments here, if there are any.) https://www.proquest.com/bostonglobe/docview/2730002915/858A1FE169EE47A8PQ/1?accountid=38363 I have an 11-year-old kid — an only child — who struggles with making and keeping friends. Last summer, my kid bonded with a child who we like very much. But after several hostings on our part, this child's family has never once invited my child to join them for anything, and assumes that we are paying for their child to be admitted to everything we do. Are we supposed to constantly ask the other family to pitch in for activities that cost money? And we'd appreciate it if they invited our kid out for something, but there's never been a hint of that. Is there anything we can do? Anonymous / Boston I reached out to my friends with children for this question, to get the parental perspective — and to my surprise, they overwhelmingly looked to their own childhoods for the answer. A whole lot of them, it turns out, were "that kid" growing up. The one who didn't have a house they could bring friends to, who didn't have the kind of parents who could be asked for money. Those former kids are grown-ups now, and they are grateful and paying it forward. So, too, are the ones whose parents had the open door, who could invite friends over or bring them along and never worry. Is paying for and hosting the other child causing you financial or other kinds of strain? If so, scale back however necessary to support the friendship over the long haul. Or is it more the principle of the thing, the sense that the other family should be reciprocating? If so, try to let it go. This kind of inequality in children's friendships is a fact of life. Sometimes kids in bad home situations even go and live with friends for a while. Especially if your child has had a difficult time socially, be as inviting and generous as you can. It will be remembered. (Besides, paying for your kid's friend's movie ticket is probably still cheaper than paying by the hour for a social-skills building group.) That said, I entirely get where you're coming from, because I'd have a similar knee-jerk reaction. Not because of the money per se, but because I wouldn't want my kid getting the idea that unbalanced, taker/giver relationships are a good thing in general. Obviously, the other kid can't really help the lack of reciprocity around hosting and money; children don't have their own money and cars and apartments, which is why I didn't like being one. But is the relationship balanced in terms of emotional labor? Does the friend share and play fair? Are they emotionally supportive? Does the relationship make your child happy? If so, don't worry about the material inequities. And if you're not sure of the answers — or even if you think you know — talk to your child about the friendship, and what they're learning from it. So often we think we're imparting Lesson X, and kids are actually picking up Subtext Y or Tangent Z instead. Miss Conduct is Robin Abrahams, a writer with a PhD in psychology. _______________________________________________ I'm pretty sure that if the parents decide to host only relatively free outings from now on - such as a drive to see the leaves changing color - and ask the kid to bring his/her own lunch - the kid won't really mind. |
| gggg gggg <ggggg9271@gmail.com>: Oct 31 08:18PM -0700 Concerning assisted dying, according to this: - Some disabled people have even decided to end their lives because their healthcare expenses grew too costly...But I'm still in favor of right-to-die rules that offer end-of-life options to more than just terminally ill patients. I've felt that way ever since I watched my grandmother waste away slowly with Alzheimer's over many years. She had told us often that she wanted to end her life before she became unable to read, speak, feed herself or dress herself. Yet for almost a decade she lay in a nursing home bed in just that condition, and there was nothing we could do to help her despite knowing her long-standing, unwavering preference. https://www.latimes.com/opinion/story/2022-09-19/aid-in-dying-assisted-suicide |
| gggg gggg <ggggg9271@gmail.com>: Oct 31 08:16PM -0700 Concerning assisted dying, according to this: - Some disabled people have even decided to end their lives because their healthcare expenses grew too costly...But I'm still in favor of right-to-die rules that offer end-of-life options to more than just terminally ill patients. I've felt that way ever since I watched my grandmother waste away slowly with Alzheimer's over many years. She had told us often that she wanted to end her life before she became unable to read, speak, feed herself or dress herself. Yet for almost a decade she lay in a nursing home bed in just that condition, and there was nothing we could do to help her despite knowing her long-standing, unwavering preference. https://www.latimes.com/opinion/story/2022-09-19/aid-in-dying-assisted-suicide |
| gggg gggg <ggggg9271@gmail.com>: Oct 31 08:40PM -0700 On Monday, October 31, 2022 at 8:18:53 PM UTC-7, gggg gggg wrote: > Concerning assisted dying, according to this: > - Some disabled people have even decided to end their lives because their healthcare expenses grew too costly...But I'm still in favor of right-to-die rules that offer end-of-life options to more than just terminally ill patients. I've felt that way ever since I watched my grandmother waste away slowly with Alzheimer's over many years. She had told us often that she wanted to end her life before she became unable to read, speak, feed herself or dress herself. Yet for almost a decade she lay in a nursing home bed in just that condition, and there was nothing we could do to help her despite knowing her long-standing, unwavering preference. > https://www.latimes.com/opinion/story/2022-09-19/aid-in-dying-assisted-suicide Do you have any feelings about that issue? |
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